A Woman's Place

Sisters,

A friend tipped me off to an article in the New Yorker about Sheryl Sandberg, the current COO of Facebook and former VPof Global Online Sales and Operations at Google.

The article is a must read and a great a conversation starter.  Sandberg has had an extroadinarily successful career and this article addresses her influential presence in the male dominated Silicon Valley.  I walked away from the article:

Wrestling with her statements about motherhood: 
She struggled with her own work-life balance, and developed a sense that too many women at Google and elsewhere were dropping out of the workforce after becoming mothers, in part because they had not pushed to get a job they loved before they began having children. In her six years at Google, she had hired scores of male and female executives, but, she says, “the men were getting ahead. The men were banging down the door for new assignments, promotions, the next thing to do, the next thing that stretches them. And the women—not all, most—you talked them into it. ‘Don’t you want to do this?’ ”   And later in the article: She said, “The No. 1 impediment to women succeeding in the workforce is now in the home. . . . Most people assume that women are responsible for households and child care. Most couples operate that way—not all. That fundamental assumption holds women back.” The second impediment is guilt, she said. “I feel guilty working because of my kids. I do. I feel guilty. In my TED talk, I’m talking to myself, too. I’m not just talking to other people. I have faced every one of those things myself.”
 
Reflecting on "success and likability":
Sandberg says she eventually realized that women, unlike men, encountered tradeoffs between success and likability. The women had internalized self-doubt as a form of self-defense: people don’t like women who boast about their achievements. The solution, she began to think, lay with the women. She blamed them more for their insecurities than she blamed men for their insensitivity or their sexism.


Thinking about selflessness among women:When Summers travelled by limousine or airplane, Sandberg gave up her seat next to him to make sure that other officials and staffers got time with the boss. “A key part of what Sheryl does in her life is helping people advance, to be seen and to be heard,” David Fischer


Don't let a case of the mondays keep you from this article...take time to read it sisters!

A Women's Place, by Ken Auletta in the New Yorker
TEDS Talk, December 2010







 

Totally Outrageous!

Sisters,

Remember this pretty lady? I have no idea what made me think about our childhood obsession with Jem, but in my recent internet musings I found so my videos of Jem!  Growing up we couldn't get enough of her...and why wouldn't we love her? She had ambition, showed leadership, knew how to accessorize, and could wear a pink dress better than anybody.  

We all know that I don't typically wear pink unless it's a cardigan, but I am happy to live vicariously through you! You should totally channel Jem and buy one of these adorable dresses from ShopBob.

Rachel Roy                      Twenty8Twelve                   Nanette Lepore

Just in case Jem doesn't convince you, check out Blake Lively at the 2009 CFDA Awards.  One of you needs to purchase a pink dress for the summer!

Much love from Chi-town!

Our Grandma

A month ago, we lost a friend that we loved very much. This weekend our Grandma Val would have celebrated her 88th birthday. She was the mother of six children she raised on her own (during a time when single mothers were few and far between), the grandmother of twelve, and the great grandmother of four. As our grandma she has woven her character, heart, and deep love into each of our lives, and for that we are eternally grateful. We wanted to take a minute here to share just one of those threads with you, an example of the way she valued kindness. Although we can't begin to pay tribute to her with a few sentences on a silly blog, hopefully what is written remains a reminder to us of how to live, because while our words can't begin to do her justice, our hope is that our lives will.

KINDNESS
While growing up we often heard “Kill them with kindness girls” whenever we came home and were angry at someone. My Grandma said it and my mom repeated it. It was almost sung as it was being said, so clear that this wasn't just a trite saying to them - it was a way to live that was pressed into their lives. When we were kids, we misunderstood it. We thought that what she meant was that kindness was the best way to drive someone crazy. If they are mean to you, be nice back, and that will make them really angry because they didn’t get a rise out of you. Then, as we got older and continued to watch the way Grandma lived, we realized we had gotten it all wrong. Grandma’s kindness did the opposite. Somehow she understood that most people weren’t born mean, that they had probably become that way for a reason. So, when someone was mean; she simply responded to them as if she knew the person they were before the world got a hold of them. She “killed people with kindness” to restore their dignity. People who met our grandma walked away with a little of the soot on their soul brushed off. 

xxx,
Christina, Kathleen, and Megan

P.S. Call your grandparents :)

Bossypants

Sisters,
Tina Fey's memoir Bossypants came out yesterday. It chronicles her life, from growing up in the burbs of Pennsylvania, to her time in Chicago at Second City, and her gig as the first female head writer for SNL. The reviews are raving and I'm not surprised, everything she's done is brilliant, so why wouldn't a book documenting that be brilliant too? I can't wait to pick up a copy.  Check out this NPR review written by Janeane Garofalo (remember how much we loved Reality Bites?):

Bossypants is not so much a memoir as it is a sort of here's-what-happened-and-why-I think-this kind of book. It's honest and intimate, without any maudlin tales of childhood sorrow, no extraneous snark or hit-and-run tell-all gossip. It's just a great read from a mature thinker. 

The book is also getting a lot of attention because of its cover. What do you think of it? Tina's dad had a few thoughts:

I hope that's not really the cover. That's really going to hurt sales. (Don Fey, Father of Tina Fey)

Ha! Love it. Now you go get your copies and we'll read it together!

With love from the city where Tina lives :)

Our America

photo by John Keatley

Sisters,
Have you seen Our America with Lisa Ling yet? It's on the O network (gotta love Opy), Tuesdays at 10/9c - but if you don't have cable (like me) you can watch it online, they post the episodes after they've aired. My friend told me about it last weekend and I love it! I've always liked Lisa Ling and so far I think this is some of her best work. It's a really well produced show chronicling some of the most controversial topics in America today. It's not perfect (as most news shows aren't), but it's thought - provoking and bringing some important conversations to the forefront. 

Check it out over here.


Love from NYC!